How does hearing you have Breast Cancer affect your spiritual health? From my own personal experience, when I was given my first news in July of 2019 it felt like a punch in my spirit. I was trying to cope and be strong for my daughter who was my biggest concern than being worried about myself. I was worried this disease was going to take me away from my daughter and loved ones. We had been praying hard over the days that led to the results of my biopsy. I questioned my faith, belief, God’s love, and prayers.
How does it affect your spirit?
Cancer can have a huge impact on your spiritual health because it triggers a level of stress that is dangerous for you. Your entire body is in a state of shock when you are told that “I am sorry you have Breast Cancer.” At the exact time in moment, the world is in a time capsule that you are trying to find the remote control to rewind what the doctor just said. You cannot believe what was just said to you and your spiritual beliefs you had since you were 23 years old has left the room.
I honestly sat there questioning my spiritual relationship with God. I anxiety that raced through my body a rage of fear, doubt, and uncertainty. I begin to question my purpose. My entire mind, body, spirit, and emotions were in shambles. I felt broken in all areas that were apart of my humanity. I became very frustrated with God and even angry at times with the biggest question that I kept asking in my prayers were “Why me”, What did I do to deserve this?” I even went as far with the question to God and asked What did I do wrong to be punished with a life threatening disease? I tried meditating to calm down search for the comfort of his voice, but I could not find it at the moment.
How did I fight through my spiritual journey?
To be honest, it was a hard. I had to go through a process ,but I was not alone. I had some amazing women who were supportive, praying women I called my tribe, my daughter unconditional love, and lots of talking to God. I did have to let go of the anger that came with being diagnosed. I had stopped talking to God because I was mad as hell at him so I did have some screaming and yelling matches in my quiet place with him, The truth is, you have to keep talking to him whether you did what I did which was yelling, crying, praying, or journaling what I was feeling and why. I found comforting listening to some of my favorite pastors or even watching them on YouTube. Each time I can tell you it was the Holy Spirit that guided me to a particular man or woman of God. The word they were preaching that particular day always resonated with me and I never not once said that was a coincidence. I told myself, “no, that was a Devine intervention from the Holy Spirit.” I remember when that small voice whispered to me that I will get through this storm, at first I doubted that voice. But I did get through it the first time and the second time.
I had to put my faith and trust back in God. I had to surround myself with positive energy that included people. I removed negative people from my presence because my spirit was vulnerable. I started keeping a prayer journal and a thought journal. I reached out to my prayer warriors who prayed with me and over me. You cannot do this alone. Furthermore, my daughter and I had to rebuild our trust, faith, and love for God’s healing that would get us both through this journey. My spirit is on a healing path after two years which makes me happy. I can give my testimony to other cancer patients. It took me over a year to let go of the anger and the unforgiveness that was in my heart toward many who didn’t give me cancer, but diagnosed me with Breast Cancer.
Dont’ let Cancer beat your spirit man down. Accept the things you cannot change but embrace the things God-The Holy Spirit can change. You will get through this. Are you feeling broken spiritually? Visit Cancer Council for support and read the articles that will give you reassurance on this emotional journey.
Cancer Council www.cancer.net/coping-with-cancer/physical-emotional-a…